Agacelli.
It's one of those names that obviously fell victim to poorly executed Americanization. An Ellis Island franken-name. Ostensibly it was Italian...although, in reality it sounds more like something a Czech woman would tell you after you sneezed. However, Julian Agacelli provided more than enough Mediterranean features to excuse her frankly unfounded insistance that it be pronounced chelli and not selli.
Yes, she is in fact a she. Julian, the she, is one of those names that obviously fell victim to poorly executed baby-name originality. Although, arguably she fared much better than the slew of Ashley's (spelled with two E's), Ashley's (spelled L-E-I-G-H), and Ashley's (inexplicably spelled A-J-L-E-E). She realized in second grade that the names on the teacher's roll simply cut off the name after 15 letters, and so preceded to effectively change her name to Julianna...even though "Julian Agacelli" is in fact only 14 letters long. But somewhere in the early adolescent quagmire that produces uncanny mood-swings and bad fashion choices, Julian decided to return to the pseudo-masculine moniker of her birth certificate.
For whatever reason "Julianna" had begun to conjure the picture of a bloated, unfaithful lady riding behind a knight. By the time she realized she had somehow misnamed Guinevere in her mind, she was already attached to "Julian." She was never quite sure why Guinevere was bloated, it probably had to do with the general body malaise of middle school.
Four states away, a girl named Kate Roy was overwhelmed by the consequences of procrastination.
"What's important, is that you finish your term paper. Just get to ten pages- turn it in."
Kate looked down-cast, "But, it's awful. That entire page...it's like the little happy paper-clip on Microsoft Word got a virus and vomited characters on the screen."
Katherine Roy was unhappily writing a paper on Marxist literary criticism of Billy Budd, and understandably was bored out of her mind. She had resorted to picking quotes at random and then fabricating how they represented the proletariat struggle against the upper class.
Kate pointed to a passage, "Rachel, it's obvious I'm making crap up."
Karl Marx's stages of societal development are evident in the dialogue of Melville's characters. The Foretopman as a character in authority represents the bourgeoisie as he urges Billy to "Slip into the lee forechains" of capitalist machinations (Melville 36).
Rachel shrugged, " I dunno sounds pretty good to me. I think making stuff up is the point of literary criticism."
Kate and Julian will never meet. And that's probably for good. You see, Kate and Julian are sort of personality doppelgangers. They like the same movies, have memorized the same lyrics, and have had crushes on Jake Gyllenhaal and Zachary Levi. They both prefer to sleep on their right sides. Their favorite season is fall. Their favorite Beatle is George Harrison--which they both picked because while they don't absolutely adore Beatles' music, saying "George Harrison is my favorite Beatle" gives you instant and unmerited street-cred with people that do. And at their current stage of life, the most important propensity is music: They sing--second sopranos, but don't tell them that, they get some kind of kick out of being the martyrs of the choir, also known as Alto 1.
Aside from being an anomaly of the universe, Kate and Julian also respectively suffer or benefit, from an uncommon amount of chance in the course of their lives. The Romans said Fortes fortuna adjuvat, Fortune favors the bold, but in this case it would benmuch more accurate to say Fortuna parit fortitude, Fortune breeds bravery. Infortunium efficit haesitavi, Misfortune makes hesitant.
Katherine Roy was unhappily writing a paper on Marxist literary criticism of Billy Budd, and understandably was bored out of her mind. She had resorted to picking quotes at random and then fabricating how they represented the proletariat struggle against the upper class.
Kate pointed to a passage, "Rachel, it's obvious I'm making crap up."
Karl Marx's stages of societal development are evident in the dialogue of Melville's characters. The Foretopman as a character in authority represents the bourgeoisie as he urges Billy to "Slip into the lee forechains" of capitalist machinations (Melville 36).
Rachel shrugged, " I dunno sounds pretty good to me. I think making stuff up is the point of literary criticism."
Kate and Julian will never meet. And that's probably for good. You see, Kate and Julian are sort of personality doppelgangers. They like the same movies, have memorized the same lyrics, and have had crushes on Jake Gyllenhaal and Zachary Levi. They both prefer to sleep on their right sides. Their favorite season is fall. Their favorite Beatle is George Harrison--which they both picked because while they don't absolutely adore Beatles' music, saying "George Harrison is my favorite Beatle" gives you instant and unmerited street-cred with people that do. And at their current stage of life, the most important propensity is music: They sing--second sopranos, but don't tell them that, they get some kind of kick out of being the martyrs of the choir, also known as Alto 1.
Aside from being an anomaly of the universe, Kate and Julian also respectively suffer or benefit, from an uncommon amount of chance in the course of their lives. The Romans said Fortes fortuna adjuvat, Fortune favors the bold, but in this case it would benmuch more accurate to say Fortuna parit fortitude, Fortune breeds bravery. Infortunium efficit haesitavi, Misfortune makes hesitant.
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