Julian spent the entire first act elated that Walt wasn't trying to let her down easy, only to realize mid-intermission that the note hadn't really ruled that out at all. This was quickly followed by the more embarrassing epiphany that her eclipse token hadn't really declared anything non-platonic either. Julian was marginally horrified with herself. While Walter Carrick experienced the cutting pain of how malicious self-awareness can be when he called himself a coward, Julian rightfully met the internal accusation with incredulity.
And Julian wasn't about to take that sitting down.
She made five or six schemes during the second act. She had snuck through the theater shop and made her way to the parking lot before realizing that even she wasn't audacious enough to leave the school in the thirty minute window before she was expected back on stage. She had written three drafts of three different notes. She had decided quite firmly that she was going to kiss Walter Carrick right on the face as she came out to take her bows. Then, on more serious contemplation of the logistics of that decided it wasn't actually such a good move. Besides, she was wearing tar-y stage lipstick and it would hardly be satisfying to either party, especially because it was the last performance and Walt would also come on stage to take a bow on behalf of the entire tech crew. No guy, no matter how smart and quirky, likes to go out in front of a large crowd of people with lipstick smudged on his face.
Valjean was ushered into heaven by a rather peeved Fantine. Thankfully, the scene didn't really require much actually acting on Julian's part. And then it was over. Julian realized that this great, frustrating, magical, time-consuming saga in her life was over. She was waiting backstage for the curtain call and acknowledged too late that Fantine was gone. She had already said her last lines. The applause was like the sound of a library in an earthquake. Julian rushed downstage and the noise surged for her. She smiled broadly and bowed deeply, humbled at the awesomeness of the moment.
The curtain closed. Goodbye Les Mis.
When Julian finally made it back to the dressing room, she changed her clothes, methodically hanging up her costume. All the other girls were scurrying around in a flurry, rushing around so that they could get out to their cars and get to the after party. Julian scrubbed her face, a stream of beige-pink water falling into the sink. Normally no one bothered to remove their stage makeup before heading out. She reapplied her normal, less oily, less intense makeup. She shook out her hair, removing all of the bobby pins. And by that point, as she had planned, she was the last woman to leave the dressing room. Walt was standing awkwardly in the hallway trying not to look like he was overtly waiting for her specifically while not appearing indifferent either. A few people were still milling around backstage, but it was a barren wasteland in comparison to what it had been. Good, Julian thought, no one will ask for a ride.
Walt put the car into gear and sailed across the empty parking lot.
It was now or never. "Walt?"
"Yeah."
"I like you." Julian's throat felt raw and swollen but she pressed on. She wasn't going to let the situation devolve into a meaningless "I like you too, I'm glad we're... friends" scenerio.
She looked fixedly at the dash not daring to see Walt's reaction. "...I mean... with the play over, I lost my excuse to talk to you everyday..." Julian's usually limitless supply of boldness was waning quickly. This was far less than the crystal clear declaration she was hoping for. She tried to say something more concretely romantic with one last push of mental fortitude but the wall of silence emanating from the driver's seat choked whatever might have come out.
Meanwhile, Walt was trying to convince himself that he had in fact come to the right conclusion about what Julian meant. She was using like, as in "I'm falling for you", not like, as in "I like three musketeers". Because let's face it, no one gets that excited about three musketeers, maybe a butterfinger, but never a fluff of a noncommittal candy bar. Just when Walt thought that Julian was going to put his doubts to rest she just stopped mid-sentence. He passed six more street lights, and it was like all of the oxygen had been siphoned out of the car. Walt was warring with himself, an epic battle between a love for safe social situations and a desperate urge to man up. His mind was cursedly blank.
His right hand shot from the wheel and grabbed Julian's hand. He missed, but Julian cooperated.
Walt made awkward, boat-like turns, steering with only his left hand, and Julian's wrist was cocked at the strangest angle but both held on to each other's hand with a death-like firmness. Both were afraid that if they made any adjustments that it would cause irreparable damage to whatever they were deciding they were together.Walt still hadn't said anything. Julian just held his hand and kept her eyes on the windshield straight ahead of her, and Walt loved her for it.
Walt pulled up along the curb in front of the house where the after party was. He tried briefly to put the car in park with his left hand before finally relinquishing Julian's hand. They made eye contact for the first time since the dressing room, both waiting for the spell to break since they had let go.
"Um." Walt's voice was dry and inaudible. He swallowed. "Um...what if..." He swallowed again. "...Wanna go to the park?"
They sat on the hill behind the jungle gym looking up at the sky to avoid looking at each other. Walt took a steeling breath and put his arm around Julian. She scouted herself closer and put her head on his shoulder.
"That's Auriga"
"What?"
Julian laughed. "The constellation. It's a charioteer. Right above that big pine tree"
"Julian, there are about a hundred pine trees over there."
Julian laughed again, and traced out the pattern between the stars with her finger.
Walt acted like he saw what she was pointing at. Then took another serious breath. "Julian...I want to see you everyday too...and the only believable excuse I can come up with is if we were dating."
He smiled so vulnerably then that Julian's heart nearly stopped. "I think I could be amenable to that solution."
Walt turned his neck and kissed her hair. "Good."
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